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Getting harder- 4A and 5A

So overall, I've had it as easy and comfortable as possible given the situation. I'm on Abraxane instead of paclitaxel, when I fly cross country every week I'm able to fly in seats with flat beds so I get a good night's rest, and my parents are still alive so my mom is able to drive me to my treatments (I'm 40). Something happened beginning with the midway point though. I began to get a bit more depressed, and chemo 4A was really really hard. I had to cancel 3 flights bc I felt too unwell to fly, including once being at the airport and then asking my mom to turn back while I canceled my flight on the phone. 4B was more manageable but I began getting cold sores on my tongue which I hadn't gotten before. I was told to get throat lozenges which seemed to help a bit. I just had 5A yesterday. I felt somewhat okay and went to lunch with some friends. And then guess what. Outside a little ways I suddenly threw up and peed in my pants /on my dress. It would have ...
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First chemo + hair loss

I had my first chemo session on Friday 1/11/19. I thought it was fitting with so many 1's in the date. I have a very low pain threshold and was freaked out about my port being accessed. I'll write about the port in another post later. So my first session was Abraxane + Carboplatin. I'm supposed to alternate every 10 days with this regime and then Abraxane only. I was pleasantly surprised that putting on the emla cream 1 hour before your port is accessed really works! But you can't put it on sparingly. Need to put a big dollop and then saran wrap over it bc it evaporates over the hour. In any case the chemo itself was very unremarkable. There were some pre-meds which took a while. Steroids (I hate- dekadrone), benadryl, Zofran,  and pepcid. I felt tired afterwards, but that could have been from sitting and doing nothing for 4 hours. I also took chocolate edibles which I feel really help. The next evening and the evening after that, so t+1 and t+2, I felt mildl...
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